The Rise of Hipster consumerism- The Singapore Context

First of all, let us define what is a hipster? why did it start, how did it came to Singapore? And most importantly, the hipster and the consumerism associated with it- within the Singapore context.

A hipster is way of life that seek genuinity, hates conformity, a sort of a rebel (Frank 1997) and believes in sustainability with their environment (nature and people). Sounds a bit like the pot smoking hippies of the 60s that protest the war, smoke pot and have endless sex.

I wouldn't say the hipster culture started but evolved is the word. it is an inevitable part of sociology where certain people are just different. we know communism does not work and absolute laissez-faire doesn't fare much better.

Hipsterism came to Singapore as an inevitable side effect of a well travelled populace coupled with cushy life expat coming to Singapore. The desire to lead a different life in the most expensive city in the world and to hide from the pressure cooker that is cooking them to the bone. 

Now back to the Singapore hipster. to sum it up, they are nothing more than pampered love child that couldnt take the grinding of a life filled with third party expectations. These are your self confessed hipster wither by admission or by their way of life. The bigger fringe group are the closet hipster that is fully in the grind of the pressure cooker but see hipster consumerism as an escape or a temporary reprieve. this it the group that is financing the hipster movement, providing the platform to breed a new generations of weaklings that in the near future forms the weak link in our society. 

You see hipsters are people who avoid a hard fight, do not understand the reality that certain elements of society need to be sacrificed for the continuation of the greater good, believes in the naivety of equality and most importantly- they are a burden to the state.

A Positive correlation exist between high cost of living, high unhappiness , high GINI index and more hipster establishments. What we see in Singapore is being replicated in cities that have this correlation. HK, KL, Shanghai, Beijing, London, NY, Sydney, Melbourne and so on. The more serious the index, the more establish the hipster consumerism culture is.

How to spot a hipster place?

1. Establish in out of the way places
2. Have large communal seating arrangement (big tables for strangers to sit together)
3. Retro or simple decor populated from cheap IKEA
4. Elements of black snd white color, chalkboard, lightbulb
5. menu with an overwhelming amount of gluten and sugar (the weak love sweet and the gluten is a sponge for the sweet)
6. Pride itself on gourmet coffee
7. young, gay, lesbian and weird staff
8. frequented by the same type of riff raff fucktards (cant tell the staff from the customers apart)
9. A nonsense name that make no sense or simply name after the road they are situated in
10. Almost always owned by unemployed sons and daughters from rich family or a closet gay or lesbian who had a well paying job prior.
11. Fancy sounding menu items which turns out to be simple bullshit (hipster are good at the branding game)
12. Mostly reviewed online by the same gay, lesbian and fucktards bloggers.


Sugar, Gluten and the poor wanabe

Who would have thought that decades of nutritional advancement would be thrown to the stone ages by the hipster. The menu on a hipster are full of sugar and gluten. it is the combination of both that in practical sense alleviates the misery of their existence. The hipsters that refuses to face reality for the failure that they are and the lack of courage to even try. 

Hopeless graduates from our degree mill that cant find work and are from a cattle class background but yet are still able to afford that $5 coffee and $6 waffle. Or the undergrad who like to convince themselves that a bright future awaits them upon graduation and hence study on the communal table in the company of hipster. Not forgetting the hoards of faggots and lesbian with their pink dot friends talking shit. Of course the most important group are still the closet hipster that seek escapism by overpaying for unhealthy feminine food in a god forsaken place.

A movement need to be brought upon in the community to fight the hipster movement. They are like a cancer in our society, turning up weaklings, gays, lesbian and diabetics right under our nose. As we speak, the hipster cafes are all over singapore even in places where people are suppose to survive on community handouts. The weakened generations will erode our country competitiveness and the health cost associated with a hipster diet will bankrupt our healthcare system. 

Sugar tax

For a start, all hipster cafe can start paying a sugar tax or value added tax for their menu items to subsidise the ill effects they bring to our society. While a dictatorial regime could simply shut them down, a socialist place like singapore could only use legal sanctions to turn the hipster away.

I say good riddance to the hipster and their sugar and gluten. and please dont get your weird staff to serve me.